Aita for not giving my mom money. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole.

Aita for not giving my mom money My aunt was paying for his life insurance. All the chores went to me now. So, am I the asshole? I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Our friendship is not about her money issues, but she does call me is when she has issues but that's what friends do. For a little bit of background i moved away from my mom to live with my dad when i was 16 because of us not being in a stable situation and it just being overall better for me to stay with my dad, fast forward 2 years i am 18 and have a stable job and i moved in by myself (with a roommate of course) now here is where things get a little wild, after not hearing from my mom (1)The action i took that should not be judged is refusing to give half of my paycheck every time i get paid to my mom and instead settle on giving her monthly rent money. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I took 27K from my mom's credit union account when she died, and instead of giving my sister half of it, I pocketed the whole thing. Excuse my English, its not my first language Okay, so this problem may be a bit silly, but it's really on my mind. The action I took that should be judged is refusing to lend my sister money, as well as showing off my money and lifestyle too much 2) This could make me the AH if I was wrong and cruel to not help out my sister, and if I handled everything wrong. Not the A-hole Auntie fucking knew OP's mom gave the brother the money for the destination wedding, and hid it from OP. you'll be paying for two separate households when she starts to complain about not having enough money. If we came home late and dinner was over, we weren’t allowed to eat that night. Recently my son (31M) and his wife have been house hunting. My mom (43f) expects me to bend over backwards for my sister to play with her, cook her food, and just generally My mom called me 2 weeks ago to not ask but demand that I do for her the same i do for Lisa and Chris. I've since forgiven her, but money is a sore sore topic with us to this very day. I moved back in with my mom to help her. I regret it. We may be considered as not treating them the same even though she has her own money. Shortly after all that my dad passed away. It sucks, but it's how it works. Usually just scratch tickets. Step-bro has seen this movie before. My mom already knows I won’t give her money not even to borrow because I know she won’t pay me back. I never needed one because my husband is a high earner and bought our house when we were dating. " Also you are at a very normal age to be saving for college, a car, or just generally the future and she knows that. Your mother knows better and is doing this anyway. He almost immediately asked me to get him some thing and I told him not to act like my "AITA for refusing to give my mom anymore money?" I (36f) borrowed about 20 grand from my parents after they sold their business. Tell us about any non-violent conflict you have experienced; give us both sides of the story, and find out if you're right, or you're the asshole. During the last month, my mom's car has been having problems and she's been nagging about getting a new car despite the Although, my money is my money and Im tired of them resorting to me whenever. She has made in abundantly clear who she values and who she doesn't. I only found out about these coins from my other sister, Rochelle(35F) because she told me Melanie thought about giving the a coin worth $3,200 to herself, Rochelle, my brother Nick(37M), and myself. I told her no, that she still owes me money, I don’t just give money out, and I need the money for registering my car. My Mom is 85, morbidly obese her entire adult life, my entire child/adulthood. My mom paid for everything for him, his college, his healthcare, food, he lived at home, etc. Honestly, I don’t think that’s my problem. My mom and dad of course know this because they run on my account. My parents never gave us an allowance. Dad married his wife when I was 10 but they met and moved in together when I was 9. When I asked my mom about the book she told me she gave it to my Sil This went on with each present my siblings or parents had given me. I once borrowed money from my 11yo to cover an unexpected bill but I absolutely asked his permission first and payed it right back when I Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. I was about one week away from giving birth to my first child. (2) why that action might make you the asshole. Whether or not you think it would do you good to forgive your mom is something only you know. I made the decision not to tell my parents because I knew they were the kind that would possibly guilt me into giving the money. After the meal, my mother started talking about how bad was the condition of my grandparents house, I thought it was just a conversation but then she pointed out that 2 of my cousins are very ungrateful for not helping out their own grandparents even when they have money (both are also paying mortgage and one of them have children). I want to stop financially supporting my mom. Hi, I (16M), was called a bad son by my dad for not wanting to give my mom $20 every paycheck i receive. She owes me nearly $250 and asked if I could give her some money for food (about $35). I "AITA for not giving my brother a share of my inheritance for his property taxes?" When my mom passed, she left everything to my older brother, Jason. AITA for not giving After my hesitancy to lend my mom money, my mom brought up how it's okay to ask for help and how she would provide it to me if I asked. Dinner was at 7 everyday no matter what. my mom started asking again saying she’d pay me back but i said no. AITA for not giving my parents money . I f32 have recently inherited money from my mom. She pays abt 600 dollars. She hated doing it though so she would pay us to do it. Thank you for reaching out and giving my mom money. I recently graduated uni, studied with a full scholarship abroad, worked and saved enough to pay for my masters. We don't live together and both lived abroad before the pandemic. She had 4 coins worth about $3,200 and a 5th coin worth about $1,200. He isn’t asking them for money. Be calm and polite, and just let her know that going forward you'll be sayig no to those requests from her or anyone else. she doesn’t drive and only lives off her monthly paycheques. He went to my grandparents (his parents) and they For context, I 26 F, give my mom a set amount of money every month. I feel like I'm pouring my money down a blackhole. Reply NTA, but if I was you I'd tell my grandparents not to give me money anymore because "If mom finds my money in my drawer, she just takes it. My parents were separated when dad died, btw. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Don't want to give my parents money even though I can afford it, my bad feelings at how they treated me when I was younger might be making me irrational about this Definitely NTA. Do not pay your parents this money, and ignore your siblings who are asking their youngest sibling to pay for their 30K You’ll be able to take this trip even faster because you’ll save more money by not getting guilt-tripped into giving up more than half of your income to your mom. My mom has a spending problem and on top of that, she sends money back home to renovate the family house and for food. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I could be the asshole by refusing to giving my dead husband's affair partner his personal belongings for their unborn child. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: My bio mom After my parents divorced, my mom got married to a man who was an asshat. Not the A-hole I’m 22 married and have a baby on the way. I am currently pregnant with our daughter. AITA for not giving my mom free work . Mom had her half saved. yesterday and today she I’d be willing to go 50/50 with my mom, but my mom wants to take to the nearest $100 from me (so like if I earn $356 she takes $300 and leaves me with $56) which I think makes it not worth it for me to do this at all. They haven’t found anything in there budget that fits their needs. Whenever our uncles gave me and sis money, we had to give it to Bob and he divided the money Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. I responded by stating that I regularly decline help and would prefer to tend to things myself. Anyway, back to the story. But the twist was interesting AITA for not giving my sister (single mom) money for a car when I can afford to do so . When my mom died in 2011 my grandma took me in and things got a lot better. Emily' spending problem got worse since she left home and the rest of the family is no longer in the position to give them money. little backstory: so i (f18) have a job in fast food and live with my grandma who’s 10+ years into retirement. My mom is low income and on paper my dad doesn’t exist (that’s another story) so I get a pretty good financial aid package at my school. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. Even if you don't have a job now, you should set up a debit and a credit card in ONLY your name now. “Yer young and can make more money! Give all yer money to yer sister who is really old at 22 but popping out kids she can’t afford” ( no shade at sis here just the parents excuse”. Naaaah. I don’t get paid until this Thursdays, but my mom is asking for $20 out of my savings account. I (36f) borrowed about 20grand from my parents after they sold their business. Now, both my wife and I come from upper class families. They kept telling my sister that I was taking money from them so she would give them even more and turned around and said that she would not give them any so they could get ahold of more of my disability benefits. My dad has always said he will ‘even out’ the money and give me the same at some point, but I’ve never asked for it because I don’t need it - me and my husband are very comfortable. My dad said he was telling me I need to share the money. If giving them more money causes you to be resentful and ticked, which it obviously (and understandably) is, then you really, for the peace of the family and positive relationships, need to not give them any more. They negotiated their divorce themselves and did not involve lawyers. It’s somewhere I’ve wanted to go for so long and the first place I’ll ever be going to outside of the United States. Draining our accounts and leading our family to homelessness three separate times. ” When they freak out, say “Wait, you are not giving my mom money? Then why are you reaching out. Everyone pitched in for the food, my dad's best friend's wife did my mom's hair and makeup. I'm a single mom of two and money is tight, but I would never just take my kiddos money. My daughter understands why I did not give it to his children but is upset I did not give anything to her either. my mom lives w them full time in new orleans while we all grew up amd lived in st louis. My mom says my reward is I get patient care hours for grad school and I get to put it on my resume, which is true I guess. Her husband has a son who's a year younger than me and has a medical condition. They wanted my help. My mom accused me because we'd had an argument before this, and I couldn't prove her wrong. I casually mentioned this to my cousin, Roma, on our way home from college last Friday when she asked about my birthday plans. when i turned 18, i got a large amount of money from a trust fund. This is really important. my mom will continuously call us 1-3 times a day asking for $20 My mom also had some coins that were worth some money. I also said that how's about she give her daughter some money since she's the mother and cares so much about her child not having money. If someone stole money from you, you might choose to forgive them, but you'd be a fool if you gave them access to your money again. He had life insurance money left in my name. AITA for not wanting to give my mom the money I’ve saved up for a trip I’ve been dreaming about my whole life? Not the A-hole I(21f) have been planning to go to Barcelona since about a year ago. A couple days ago I casually mentioned to my brother that I'd won some money and he was surprised that he didn't know earlier. It’s a bit weird to tell someone to give money to family when you are not giving money to family. My step mom knew there was life insurance money and wanted me to give her half. AITA for not giving my birthday trip money to my cousin? Next month, I'll turn 20, and I'm planning a trip with my parents for the occasion. If we wanted money there were big ticket cleaning options we could do. I told her how much I worked for that, and that it was my money, and I didn't want to give it to my sister, as that meant not going to my dream college, since my parents couldn't support me living there. The money that I have was in a joint account (me and my dad), but step mother had access to the debit card and pin number. But I feel bad for stealing from her. AITA? I wouldnt have spent it if I didn’t think it was my money but since it was exactly the amount that she was giving to me, I thought it was. She knows I don’t trust her with money anymore. It was her choice to have you. YTA for NTA, also you need to ask your partner to list how much money she is giving them, and add it up and show her how much it will add up to after 1 year, 5 years and 10 years time. Up to this point, I didn't even know they were rich. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I kept the fact I married into money from my Mother even when we adopted my half-sister, I feel guilty over this as maybe we could have helped her moreaita for not Originally I was going to help my son in his girlfriend Sammie 19 for their wedding giving them money because both work at a restaurant for minimum wage. Edit 3: I am not getting child support, you can't squeeze blood from a stone. She AITA for telling my parents that of they give my brother money I will stop giving them money. I dont think its fair to get mad at me for refusing to pay for something that isnt even necessary right now. Now that I am a mom, I know I would never, ever ask my child for money or guilt her into giving it to me. He has a daughter Ashley 14 from a previous relationship. I learned a lot when I took over the finances for my mom, and shared this with the siblings. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I may be an asshole for not sharing the inheritance with my sibling because they did go through hardship with having my dad as a father, my dad wasn't the best dad and AITA for not giving my mother my inheritance money . Not the A-hole I (17F) have an online shop that I've been running for about a a two years now. Even then, my mom's legacy is After the parents died, my sister and I found that they’d been using us both as cash cows, and blaming it on the both of us. Recently, my mom showed up to my aunt’s house begging for financial help. AITAH? An "AITA for not giving my husband my emergency fund" story where the husband isn't TA (or, isn't the only AH)? Say it ain't so! That said, I 100% support the "escape money" idea and will probs do it when I marry. The best thing for you to do is to keep communication to a minimum and just live your life. I was her only kid. i live rent free but have to pay for my own things and pitch in for groceries. So far my relationship with Sammie was ok but I noticed she has a habit if buying clothes outside of her means. Don’t get me wrong, I miss my (1) what action you took that should be judged and What I did or rather what I didn't do is: I did not increase the amount of money I give my wife each month. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! AITA for not giving up my room because my half sister wanted it as a “christmas gift” Her husband offered to give me money to decorate the other room without spending my money but i still declined. Dad pointed out I have money saved and "giving your mum spending money won't hurt". Right? I thought this was AITA, not Entitled Parents or Entitled People. This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. I don’t keep all of my money for myself either. My mom has a car, and she mainly uses to go to my sister's house (33F) to look after her kids (7M and 2M) twice a week. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I denied lending any more money to my in-laws after several on going requests to borrow from my wife and I. She is functional, but I have helped her Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. My husband had the idea to save the money she was giving us as rent and give it all back to her when she’s about to move out as a surprise. Not the A-hole My (34M) parents (59,61) live a gluttonous lifestyle. 5k saved up from an old job, birthdays, and money I inherited from my grandma. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Because your supposed to help your family if they need it and have for the longest time but at a certain point you gotta give them tough love I would help them if things were that dire. Now this is where my problem comes in. My dad was broke by then and my mom was sending whatever money she made down to her family in Panama. To make this already long story short, my whole family had cut me off and parents disowned me until I give my brother my house. He always bullied me for playing video games, and because I’m fat (I'm not going to sugar coat it), I moved in with my dad at 10. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I didn’t pay my dad money after my When my wife asked if she was okay, she suddenly exploded, accusing us of punishing her for not having kids and taking away the money that she would have used if she had children. Not the A-hole POO Mode I think I could be the AH for not helping my mom/giving her the money. Our finances are no one else’s business. That was all he would say. So she grounded me for a year. a couple days after, we got into a fight and she said i was “dirty,” and sent a video of my room to my uncle. 15F here. Therefore, I am also living temporarily - so I can sublet my house - with my mom (48) and my sister (17). Jason was freaking out during the reading because he didn’t get anything, and he’s already going through most of my mom’s money and hasn’t worked in 5 years since her death. It is getting annoying. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. so far ive only spent $10,000 (only about $1. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: my action is that i declined giving my father the money i had earned 2) i feel that i spent a lot of money on tuition and feel bad that i used his hard earned money. My aunt was very adamant that she can’t have it. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or (that’s a whole other story for another time). AITA for giving my mom money in front of her relatives and telling her to decide who gets it. My mom has since passed away but that gravy train stopped years before. they said they needed to buy food for me and them to eat. my fiance at first said I deserved it and have the right to do whatever I wanted with it. Read this before contacting the mod team. fast forward : recently i said that i was no longer giving anyone any more money as i felt taken advantage of. I have about $2. Things my mom did not need at all. I have some hard feelings toward her for things that she’s said to me that have nothing to do with this inheritance situation. I (15f) was 13 at the time and Alan's two kids were "Emma" (9f) and "Noah" (3m). Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! My mother asked me to give my sister my savings and I was really shocked. Things that are ok but not step Mom had her half saved. she was only parent and losing her is beyond devastating. This also is not the first money issue she has had in the past. However, she could withdraw MY money without my consent. It doesn't belong to me. I might be the asshole because it's not that i can't give her more money. 5k was on myself, the rest on my brother and mom) My aunt told her that my parents were out of town and she should go to their house. Now my mom borrowed quite a few My parents have always known I’m good with money, but recently, my mom (48F) has been pressuring me to give her access to my savings account. 3 months later I paid back every cent. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I sent money to my sister and didn’t discuss it with my boyfriend. I called my mother to tell him to duck off and lo and behold, my mother sided with my brother. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I decided to not give my mom the money she needs to fix her car because she already owes me money and she thinks I should because she is my mother. Reply Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. My brother repeatedly said since our mom said the house is his now, I cannot do anything but give in. She's been my step mother for 1. Edit 2: not that it matters to the question, our son was very much planned. Your Mom can work and they don’t need to give money to the church. He isn’t responsible for his sister or her kids. He saved it from WORKING. For two years I’ve been giving my mom more than half my paycheck and on top of that I have my own credit card and schooling to pay for and I see that I’m saving no money and have no money left over for myself and I want to move out soon and live my life. My brother didn’t want to hear my reasoning and started accusing me of not showing compassion for my mother who has done so much to give us an amazing childhood. Anyways, i got my money and my You do not owe your parents money for being successful and clever. And 2. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I told my mom that I hate her because of the things she did while in an abusive relationship, and I didn't forgive her for kicking me out. They ended up going to the bar/restaurant my mom used to work at. the kids aren’t magically owed a lump sum of cash just cause there’s money going around. My mother ruined my credit and often guilt ed me into giving her my money. my stepdad has two kids. I basically moved out after my parents told me to give up my living area to my brother. I just found out she sometimes “forgets”. Family doesn't mean as much as everyone makes it out to be. She immediately agreed and bought her one, and said it was because "she's too young to know how to earn money". The situation became really tense, and she stormed out after the argument. Thankfully, he sent the money directly to me and not my mom because everytime he would send me money through her she would only give me half of it. My siblings and I often helped my mom, not knowing that she didn't have money because it was all going to my sister. He said bills were tight and it was the twins birthdays and the money needed to go on something for them. 3months later I paided back every cent. She cleaned me out of $600 one day and never paid it back. I started saving up Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. My sister and her husband give my mom more money than I do and they have a baby which makes me feel even I’m currently 28 and doing well financially. AITA for not giving my daughter her college fund Asshole I (54F) have a fund that could comfortable pay for four years college, and I told my daughter (19F) that I would take care of her undergrad, She however didn’t need and ended up getting a full ride including tuition, dorm, food etc. If the roles were reversed and it was my mom who had died and I AITA for giving my mother an ultimatum to choose which child she wants to live with her? Not the A-hole I moved in with my mom after she got sick to help her. We told my dad he needed to pay. For example, everyone was responsible for the dishes but only my mom was responsible for her car. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I would be judged for not giving my mom my check and I may be the asshole for this and wanting to cut off contact with my mom. My mom eventually remarried to Bob. For context: I (M18) don’t have any money in my bank account besides like $60+ in my savings account. and ask her if you would prefer to have that money for retirement/fun holiday instead of giving to her family. Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. my mom lives 45min to 1 hour away with my little brother and step father. this was weird because they have never asked for money, so i asked them why and they got frustrated with me which i don’t understand because i just just asking a question. Unfortunately, she ended up losing a lot of her deposits and now her budget is less than half of what it used to be. I might be the asshole for leaving without really communicating that I was moving out and leaving them all short of funds. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Just one room but nicer than my house. My daughter does not know that we have been saving her rent money. but this year she wanted to give everyone an extra $200. I told my husband to respond that she could come take it back cause I was not gonna give her the $30. Its just that i refuse to because of certain circumstances. She didn't want to be alone and she has enough land that we could build another house on the property. My mom called me a brat and said i was almost 17 and should grow up, that i wouldn’t be in the room anymore than another 2 years so it For his second marriage, the one to my mom, they had a small backyard ceremony with their closest friends. My husband is not okay with that because he got "attached" to the machine, whatever that means, and to just give her the $30. Me and my wife aren’t going hungry but definitely need extra money. Also apparently my mom is diabetic now and my dad has always had heart problems. I knew they were well off, but Max works his ass off, and never talks about money. Growing up, I (25F) believed my dad died in a car accident when I was two. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. I'm (23F) saving up for my first big solo trip, I work 80 hours a week and am frugal with my money. AITA For Not Giving My Daughter Money After She Ignored Me Her Whole Life She only has one blood relative that is there to help her but her mom also doesn't have a lot of money. My siblings are MIA so it was just me helping my mom. I told my husband if he wanted to keep the machine then he should give his mom the money she wants. (2)The action might make me an asshole because I am not supporting my mom financially. My sister lives three states from our parents and apparently I'm right in the middle. Not to mention she will get my inheritance. my gma usually just gives us $100 each for xmas. I got so fed up with him telling people that I never give him money towards bills and he pays everything that I decided to completely stop giving him money altogether. She got frustrated, raising her voice slightly and saying she's not my daughter, and I still didn't tell and just said if she changed her mind about getting money, I won't turn But my mom says this is exactly what the money is for and should bail now. She called our aunt to say she couldn't find a place she could afford overnight, so aunt gave her my address and told her to stay with me. My cousins (30F and 27F) and I all contributed to help my aunt/uncle to finally purchase their own home last year. They flat out suck. My mom has been married to her husband for 9 years. She shouldn't expect an invitation or time at Christmas or anything. Three months later she told me my brother was moving in to help too. Step mother and I obviously don't get along. I was livid. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: AITA? I feel for him and know that my son and his family deserves a nice place to live, but neither me or my wife is able to just give him that amount of money as of right Nta. I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. My boyfriend refused to move back in with parents because he considered that a step backwards in life. Being your mother does not come with an IOU. Do I accidentally took a “gap year” because l left my parents’ house when I turned 18 and they drained my savings and checking accounts, so I was forced to find a job immediately (I did eventually get my money back, but not for almost a year, and I obviously had to eat and pay for necessities in the meantime. AITA for not giving my stay at home wife more money? My(29m) wife(26f) quit at the beginning of this year her relativley well paying job in video game development to pursue a writing career, that’s great, I think she’s a great writer and wholeheartedly support her choice. 2. In 2019 he told my mom he would split the cost of a trip I wanted to go on with one of my clubs, because she didn’t have the money all by herself. My husband and I own our own home, we have several very profitable investments and work high paying jobs. I’m in college now, and the money and house will come to me soon. I feel like an asshole for abandoning my mom. This is because my sister doesn’t have the grades to get scholarships and will need money to pay for college, whereas I can go for almost free. They are both morbidly obese and have been for years. My mom wants me to split it with my 2 soon to be 3 younger siblings. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I spent money I had saved for my dad and I to take a trip on other stuff after he included his stepdaughter in the plans. My parents were on vacation. As she wrestles with not being able to help her mother out financially, she’s faced I've been giving my mom money since I started working in high school. So some of her family think I’m wrong for not giving her any of the money, AITA for nor giving her any? Edit 1: ex wife signed a quit claim deed on the house. Essentially, they wanted me to go to an affordable option and give the college fund to my sister. Also my dad gad a work accident a few months ago and he was forced to retire so now their income has My mom knew about the money, but cannot access it. TW: divorce, parental alienation Original post by u/daughterissues3872 in r/AITA. This was in no way her money. Those are choices they are making, and you don’t need to finance those choices. I never liked Bob because he always have to be in control and placed us on a strict schedule. You did not ask to be born, you do not owe them financially. My older half sister (different dads) was not a pleasant person to be around and my mom was so busy working I felt like I was really alone. It boggles my mind. Now my parents contacted me. She knows what she's doing is wrong. My sister and mom didn’t like this decision. She's always done this so it's making me doubt whether I'm being reasonable or not. I see her with those YSL bags and she wears Golden Goose sneakers. I am not working right now because she told everyone now everyone is asking for money. My dad gave my sister £30k towards her deposit to buy a house. It was a good amount - not life changing for me but substantial. Nobody in this family (so far) has any respect for OP. My dad gave my mom more than half of their total assets because she had been a SAHM and he still had earning potential when they AITA For Not Paying For My Stepchildren's College? Not the A-hole Throwaway Account OP literally said she gave the mom the money so she could do with it as she saw fit and she did. But I don't want to give people I barely know money. He knows that if Tessa wants something, Brad will make sure she gets it. She's retired and gets a pension but she says it's not enough to cover her expenses. I'm 23 now. They are all OK with treating her as the cash cow and letting the shyte AITA for not giving my dad money that my mom left to me and my siblings? Not the A-hole My (43F) mom (72F) passed away suddenly last year. I comforted and encouraged him while he cried against my huge belly. Well it is your money and your choice, just dont I (15f) was home alone a few months ago, and my mom's bracelet she got from her late sister went missing. She says it’s because the “AITA for not giving my mom the money I saved up that she really really needs to save her and her baby’s lives?” The Original Poster (OP) explained: “I’m the fourth oldest of ten kids. I also realised after I told my father that he did not know about my mom borrowing AITA for giving my wife’s ex money? Not the A-hole My wife divorced her now ex husband a few years ago and pays child support, she gave her rights to the kids. That he was making it clear who was more important and I was going to stay with "AITA for refusing to talk to my mom after she gave my stepsister my wedding fund?" My stepsister was going to get married this summer but she had to postpone. You would not be an AH either way. That’s your "AITA for not giving my mom her monthly money so I could have extra spending money on my vacation?" For context, I (26F) give my mom a set amount of money every "AITA for refusing to give my mom anymore money?" I (36f) borrowed about 20 grand from my parents after they sold their business. Since I'm not there I did not pay rent or give them money for groceries. Dad has me (18m) and his wife has Ellie (17f who will be 18 in a week). I know that eventually it will be the death of me if I keep providing for her while she's still actively gambling. 5 years. i said no because it’s my money and we are doing My mom accrued so much debt by giving my sister money. I told her no and that it was given to me by my TRUE mother. There's always something in the back of my mind that tells me I need to provide for her. Something we couldn't do before because my husband kept giving money to his side of the family to help them with bills, groceries, legal troubles, etc. AITA for not giving my fiancés daughter money when I won the lottery? Not the A-hole All names have been changed. My sister also sends my parents money, however, it is not consisted nor nearly as much as I give them. I give my mom $200 a month in gas and groceries, stop at the campus food pantry every week, I give her the money from my Pell grant (little over 3k a year), and use my bookstore credits to get school for context , my mom is a single mom and has raised my brother (22) and i (18) on her own. The thing is, I’ve spoken to my mom about her financial situation and she has assured me she is fine. She has never asked for money. It sells mostly stickers with my custom art, as well as some other small items. In other words, she asked my mom for the trip money, and my mom told her Then he started saying this to his and my friends randomly in conversations. I know she has been low on funds for many years, and I always find ways to accomplish things in my own way. I have given my mom some money in the past but I can no longer do so as my husband and I are trying to buy a house and are trying for our first child. Aita for refusing to give my mom anymore money . She asked me how much money I gave her in total, saying she'll give it all back, and I didn't tell her. Anytime she asks I refer to her all the times I let her borrow money. I told her I had money in my savings account as sort of general information in a conversation we had this morning. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I screamed at my mom and accused her of taking my money and she was really upset that I would accuse her of that. Apparently my father lost his business during COVID, my mom has always being a SHM, they declared bankruptcy and are really struggling (they live in an old camper). In that moment I didn't want problems and the shock of the moment made me want to leave as soon as possible, my mom said she didn't believe me either but she gave me some money to live for a few months, time I took to get a job and rebuild my life, I know it wasn't easy, I planned to ended my life and my sister's one as a revenge before, but A couple of years ago my father passed away. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: (1)I think i might be in the wrong because i refused to lend half of the money i saved up from my summer/ weekend job in the bank to my grandparents when they needed it AITA by not giving my mom money for a furniture payment for her house when it puts her in the negative? Not the A-hole To start off, I have lived with my mom for almost my entire life, and briefly lived with my grandpa while I finished high school. Now my mom borrowed quite a few people who she agreed with that they could pay her in instalments instead of the full amount. My brother also kind of lives off and on at her house. Money that was supposed to go towards their retirement. and honestly they’re great people. Threw away clothes, books, birthday gifts, anything that wasn't an heirloom or necessary. Sweeping the basement out was a big one that my dad hated. My mom, ever the people pleaser, did end up working that AITA For telling my mom I'm done giving up my life for my younger sister? my mom for one. Having said that, not giving them money may harm your relationship significantly, and you need to be prepared for that. Noah was diagnosed with cancer last year and my mom and her husband were told there's some kind of different treatment he could get in another country and if they could raise the money, it would be better for Noah than the treatments available in the US. My grandma aka mom's mom died recently and I found out she had left a sizable amount of money for me. I told her she already had money and a job. He told me we could do something as a family when the trip happened instead. In order to help with that I have started various side work including lawn care, I have offered this service to my mother but she feels because of all she did for me as a child My husband and I have it as a policy that we will only loan out money if we internally accept that we may never have that money repaid. Now D has been my friend for nearly 4 years, and every time I’ve given her money, she’s never paid it back. I like to play the lottery sometimes. This way when you have a job you won't have to scramble to create an account and you'll have a chance to establish credit in your name which will be necessary if you go to rent an apartment on your own later (I'm going to guess your parents Not the asshole, my mom has been the same way since I started working at 13 building and installing signs (currently m24) and she still asks for money from time to time. When I was 15, I had a custodial account and I could not withdraw MY money without my mother's consent. NTA for not giving mom money. This time I won Now, a week after being told of this trust, I received a call from my uncle stating that it was now my grandmother’s wishes that I give his son, my cousin (32m) $200,000 of the $400,000 I inherited from my mom. ) Forgiveness is not, however, giving an abusive person a free pass to abuse you again. The money can barely be called inheritance because my mom and her family didn't have much but it's better than nothing. I stole £75 from her last year but she found out and I felt terrible so I think this just adds to it AITA for not giving my mom $180 to bail my sister out AITA for refusing to talk to my mom after she gave my stepsister my wedding fund? Not the A-hole Since mom gave away your money she is back stabbing and untrustworthy and has lost your respect. i’m not a lawyer but, Three kids, plus the income at the time they divorced should be around 2,000 just by She always makes me feel like I'm a bad person for wanting my money back, or for not giving her money. Thank you to everyone who gave me the advice I needed. I told them their money problems are not my issue, and if Sadie's items get stolen again or they try to pull her out of school, I'll be taking this to court. AirPods was just a charger block? Adapter? gift cards were used and had $0 balance, a card with Monopoly money, and so “you have given a lot to think about. Update 17 hours ago. Recently, I started thinking that I should stop giving her money since for one, I have to pay my share in rent and I also have to do my own shopping but I also don't know for a fact Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. AITA for giving my son money for clothes but not my daughter? Asshole We are not giving money to my daughter that we are giving to my son. We’ve been together 2 years. I told him no. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I might be TA because I know my mom is struggling to pay the bills with her unemployment checks, but I won’t give her my inheritance money because I want to use it far Yesterday dad asked how much I was giving mum and I pointed out she had just gotten birthday money and I was giving her money for the airport. My bf has a different circumstance, he is making a lot more money now and he said he wasn’t going to give his mom any money. . My mom got married to "Alan" 2 years ago. she was always mean to him growing up and never My family is furious with me, calling me ungrateful and dramatic, but I can’t bring myself to forgive her for what she did. She is the parent, no matter if you are Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. My Mom was the only person I trusted enough to ask My dad was a junkie when I was born, and when I was three just picked up and left my mom and me. But his ex wife and kids 21yo brother landed across the ocean in my studio apartment, not knowing how to take care of himself, not even how to make some food. Money that I worked very hard for. She insists that it's my responsibility as her daughter to help her out financially. My mom was getting me to give her relatives money while I was on vacation with her. That's not personal against my stepsister but we're not sisters or even family beyond her mom being married to my dad. Not the A-hole I'm visiting my mom's home country and everywhere we go someone needs something and my mom expects me to pony up some cash. My (16F) mom is a single mom of 6, including me, they go from 2 to 14, the three oldest (12, 14 and me) try to help her as much as we can since she has two jobs, my dad and I get along just fine, he and my grannies give me an amount of money per month ($300) since I turned 13, I usually took $100 for my things, I give her $100 for bills and I return $100 to my dad to have an When I would bring this stuff up to him he’d tell me it was natural to feel jealous of sharing his attention. She rendered him So, AITA for not wanting to give him money? TL;DR: I don't want to give my mom's husband money because I dislike him. After remarrying, Brad's #1 priority is doing whatever it takes to make 26-year old Tessa happy; including bullying his wife and maligning his 16-year old step daughter. this was made known. I told him to forget it. She’ll be so happy to hear about your support. My mom also has two kids with her husband/my half siblings. That marriage is going on 34 years this year. The owner saw her, greeted her like family, and handed her an apron, despite my mom clearly being a plague bearer. she can’t control her money. my gma was just gonna write a check to today my parents asked me if they could have my money. She doesn’t ask for a little Hello I live with my mom and sister in a two bedroom apartment. I 35 female am engaged to my fiancé Brian 37 male. I make 38,400 a year and get paid biweekly. When asked what money he will be giving to his son, my cousin, out of his portion of the $400,000, he said nothing, he will keep the When my mom doesn’t have any more money she starts calling me and says she needs grocery or gas money for herself but I know the money will just go to my brother. That’s the story my Despite her hard work and determination, Aita lacks the financial resources to help her mother. I said no, I don't have parents anymore. I have set up education accounts for my younger brother and sister and I set aside $5000 from my savings to give my other brother when he gets married. If she's not usually an unreasonable person, talk to her at a neutral time when she is not asking for money, and let her know that you don't feel comfortable lending her money in the future. i said if that’s the case, stop asking me for stuff. My aunt was the one who mentioned it. 13 months ago, OOP wanted to know if she was an AH for not giving her daughter money when she had little contact with her daughter during the daughter's life. My mom died when I was a baby. Few minutes later my step mom came into my room and demanded that I give my step sister some of my money. I repeated what I told mum and said the money was being saved so I can pay for my 1st year of Uni (which my parents Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. smfo rxfxl wdumxga qyfgn ptrxr zeihwh lobjyc mjclquh gqls qsbcwg